From a very young age, I was a gigantic film buff. Not a weekend went by where I didn’t see a movie in the theater or rent one with my friends after riding our bikes to the town Blockbuster. Yes, Blockbuster was still around in my youth. (I’m young, but not THAT young!) While I still love the entertainment value that TV and movies bring to my life even to this day, it always came down to the story. It doesn’t matter how great the special effects are or how captivating the music is, if the story isn’t of interest, the whole thing just falls apart.

Stories give us the opportunity to experience feelings or situations we normally don’t encounter our daily life or they allow us to walk a mile in a character’s shoes who may be different from us. They can help you relate to others and maybe even help you find things within yourself that you didn’t even think about. I bet you don’t have spider powers like Peter Parker in Spider-Man, but I’m sure some of us can relate to being an awkward teenager who has to start taking responsibility. I’m sure none of us are quite literally living the same exact day over and over again like Phil Connors in Groundhog Day, but I am sure we’ve wondered what it would be like to do the right thing after messing up and wishing we had the chance to do things over.

No matter how high-concept they may seem, the best stories have lessons for us and ways to relate to the characters. Which is why diving deeper into the stories Jesus told is the perfect way of beginning Hoboken’s Grace’s brand -new series, _In Real Life_. Reading the Bible is comforting for many, but for others it can feel like you’re grasping at thin air. Often times stories make sense to those at the center of them, but for others you may be left wondering “where do I fit into all of this?” To help us understand how we can relate to these stories in our daily lives, Pastor Chris spent the first sermon in the series talking about Luke and the parables that Jesus often shared as a way to understand His teachings better. Luke traveled a lot with Jesus and made sure to make an account of all the stories Jesus told so that he could remember and pass them down.

In week 1 of the series, Pastor Chris discussed the story about a farmer who would throw his seeds around during his planting. The seeds the farmer threw haphazardly would fall on some rocks, get eaten by birds, and even land on the hard ground; not exactly the best-case scenario for trying to grow crops. But when the seeds landed on the good soil, it produced more than one hundred times what was sown. It wasn’t a coincidence that Jesus used a farmer as an example in the story. Pastor Chris pointed out that He was telling this story in an agricultural area and this was the best way that He could relate to the listeners and help them understand who God was. The different places where the seeds landed represented different people who would hear the word of God and how they would absorb the word and grow. Even though the disciples were initially confused by this, Jesus took them aside and told them what all the symbolism meant, knowing that that they would pass this story on in the future.

This past week, Anthony continued the series of Jesus’ parables with the story of the lost sheep which was another example of Jesus creating a story that related to a major occupation during this specific Biblical time and place. None of us in Hoboken are shepherds, at least in the Biblical sense, but we can all relate to the idea of someone who cares for us, loving us so much, that they will stop at nothing to protect us and save us no matter how weak or insignificant we may feel compared to everybody else. Its stories like this one that give us a poignant grasp on what the love of Jesus looks like and how powerful it is. Sometimes our own stories about being lost and found are so personal that they are difficult to put into words. When telling your own story you may find that using examples of everyday life to help paint a picture like Jesus often did, can help you get your point across and make it easier when sharing how He has impacted you with others.

During his message, Anthony also said that when he was growing up he wanted to be Indiana Jones. While not a real person, Indiana Jones still represented an adventure-seeking part of Anthony that he related to. Anthony could imagine himself in middle of an exciting adventure like Indy and it made his own dreams feel attainable. That’s the power of a great story. They can make us dream about what we could be, or help us understand things that we normally wouldn’t think about. It can sometimes be difficult to read the Bible and understand how to interpret the stories or figure out how they fit into our lives in the year 2020 but when you read between the lines, you’ll discover that the stories are universal. Stories connect us all and when we consistently weave them into our daily lives, we will find that they can have new meaning and significance at different times. That’s why I’m excited for what’s still to come in this series because stories are always teaching us and the stories of Jesus can connect us, impact us, and speak to us whatever we’re going through.


Blockbuster Stories


One of the great ways our church has been able to stay connected and involved with the community during quarantine and social distancing is by posting “A Day in the Life” videos. If you aren’t familiar with this [online series,](https://hobokengrace.com/blog/story/) it’s where Pastor Chris interviews somebody in the church family about their current situation during the ongoing pandemic. We thought it would be a great idea to do the same in the written form to get even more people involved and sharing their stories.

Back in the days when we were able to attend church in-person, one of the bright, shining faces you would see in the morning as you walked in, was that of Millie’s. Millie is on Hoboken Grace’s first impressions team as a greeter and we wanted to share her incredible story of all the things that God has been doing in her life and her family’s life during these uncertain times. Millie’s story is full of encouragement and inspiration for anyone feeling lost and doubtful because of everything going on in our world today.

**Story Team:**

**What is your current situation right now?**

**Millie:**

We stayed in Hoboken. My husband works for the Board of Education and I am a medical receptionist. My husband got sick with Covid early in March, right when everything started up here. When they closed the schools, they asked everybody to still go into the school, but they didn’t know that there was somebody already infected and he got sick in the school. I had just started a job and I had to call the them up and say “I can’t come in, I’m quarantined. I have to stay here.”

We live in a railroad-style apartment, so there’s not really a lot of privacy in this apartment. But we put him in one room and we tried to keep him there, but it was really scary because you can’t go in there and comfort him, you can’t go in there to talk to him because you are afraid. I live with my 11-year-old daughter, and we just had to look in through the door. So, knowing that he was sick, knowing that he had this thing that he could give to me or my daughter, was the scariest thing. Then not even being able to hold him, and not able to say “hey, everything is going to be ok,” was really scary.

I prayed a lot. I sat, and I prayed and I meditated. I prayed a lot for his healing, but it was just really scary.

**Story Team:**

I’m sure. Yeah. Especially in the earlier days too. Like you said, this was in March that this happened which was back when things just started to happen and I’m sure you didn’t know what was going on.

**Millie:**

Yeah, and I spoke to my dinner group; my dinner group has always been the online only group, we have a chat group on WhatsApp, so I told them. I said, this is happening and I’m freaking out and I don’t know what to do. We went on a zoom call and we all started praying. I just started trusting God. I think this is the first time in my life where I’ve had to trust Him so much. I left it up to Him, and as scared and as worried as I was of me getting sick or my daughter getting sick, I just trusted Him. I didn’t feel that He left me, it was a peaceful feeling.

**Story Team:**

That’s awesome. Now you’re leading right into my next question which is how are you experiencing God through all of this? It sounds like the key word you said there is trust and this is the first time you needed to trust Him this much. What has your relationship with God been like now versus pre-quarantine?

**Millie:**

So, what I usually like to do is get up earlier than anybody because I like to pray and meditate. Before, I was always in a hurry, I had to get up and ready for work, but you don’t have much time to do it. But this time I just said, “you know what? It’s ok. Let me just sit here. Let me just stay with Him and let me just pray.” My words just kept coming out towards trust: I’m going to trust You with this one. I’m going to trust You with my day to day. I know that he is going to be ok and I know that You are taking care of him.

If this would have happened to me a year before, I don’t think I would have been this ok with it. I think I would have been a little more doubtful. I don’t know what happened, I just trusted the whole situation and my dinner group was completely on top of everything. I feel like they really helped me out.

**Story Team:**

That’s great. You said that you have been in an online dinner group from the start. So, this whole online transition we’ve been going through isn’t really new I guess.

**Millie:**

No. We have the OG!

**Story Team:**

The OG of online dinner groups. So, it sounds like you have nothing to compare it to, but seemed very helpful none the less.

**Millie:**

Yeah. I think also the fact that I like to be around people, people make me happy, so, going to church was something that I really enjoyed, not only because I wanted to listen to the service but because I enjoyed being around people. So that was really hard for me not to be there in person because even in my hardest time, I would always go. While there, I always tried to connect with everybody. Now I try to log-in to anything I can. Before, if anybody had invited me to a huddle at the church I wouldn’t go, but now I go to them because I feel that I need to hear from people.

I also felt at all times that He was with me. Even at night, when I was praying with my daughter and my husband was stuck in the other room, we still felt safe, and I know that she did too. My husband recovered, thankfully.

**Story Team:**

Prayers answered. That’s great! How else have you been connecting with other people other than the huddles? Maybe talking to friends and family over the phone or writing letters? Millie:When we were quarantined the other way, I didn’t feel so alone because I had a parade of people coming by and dropping stuff off, making sure that we were ok and making deliveries. I told my neighbors because I wanted them to be safe, so I explained to them that we are stuck in here and to be careful. Practically every day somebody would leave us a bagel or leave us coffee or leave us other things. So inside of me I wasn’t feeling very good, but outside the world was saying that it was all going to be ok.

My son came by and he left coffee because I love coffee, so he left a lot of it by my door. But the hardest part was not opening the door, not being able to hug him and say I love you. But he just kept saying that it was going to be ok and how much he loved us; it felt really good to hear.

Then, after my husband had recovered, two weeks later he got sick again and he just couldn’t breathe. I called his doctor and the doctor said to take him to the ER, because since nobody knew a lot about the disease, they were afraid it might be coming back. So, my daughter and I dropped him off at the ER and we just left him there. We drove him over there together but we just had to let him go because they wouldn’t let us in and that was the scariest time. I just thought, what if this is the last time I see him? Just watching him walking in there alone, was so frustrating.

On the way, back I just couldn’t drive so I parked in the middle of the road. I sat there and I prayed with my youngest daughter because I was so scared I would have to tell her that he wasn’t coming home. It was one of my hardest moments and yet I felt like God was there telling me “I got this. Just hold on, because I got this.” I didn’t want to doubt Him and I just kept saying, “I trust You, I trust You, I trust You.” I was so scared and didn’t have anybody to hug, it was a very hard time for me; I was so scared.

Thankfully, he came back home that night. The hospital was amazing, they called me every five minutes saying, “we’re going to do this, we’re going to do that,” and my oldest daughter works there so she ran down there to make sure that he was ok.

**Story Team:**

That’s good that you had someone that was able to be there.

**Millie:**

Yeah. So, he came home and they gave him steroids because his lungs were affected by the virus. Then they did an x-ray and a couple of days later and the doctor called. My husband had scars in his lungs because of previous problems with his lungs, but the doctor said to him “I can’t even find the scars that you had before. You don’t have anything there.”

**Story Team:**

Wow. That’s incredible.

**Millie:**

His lungs were so good. He did say that “the virus is kicking your butt basically, and it’s going to feel that way, but you’re going to be ok.” It was amazing.

**Story Team:**

And we know it’s a happy ending right now. Everybody is back home and healthy. That’s really encouraging to hear. In terms of your day to day, how have you been getting through it? Has something been helping you creatively, or do you have some sort of new routine for yourself and for your family?

**Millie:**

I try to keep a routine, especially because my daughter is still in school. I still try to get up early before everybody so I can meditate and pray, and I have a devotional, while also reading whatever is in the Hoboken Grace daily Bible reading. I go through all my things with my morning coffee.

**Story Team:**

Gotta have the coffee!

**Millie:**

Then my daughter will get up for school and we deal with the frustrating nature of online school, like the emails and all the back and forth.

**Story Team:**

It sounds like an interesting time for schooling.

**Millie:**

It can be tough. After we do school, which is usually just a half a day, I feel like I’m the principal and the vice principal. After school she does band, so we set that up, and we also do stretching for her cheerleading because eventually that is going to come back. Then after 2:00, we start to set up for dinner. After that we go for a walk, because we are now able to go out for walks. My husband, me, and my daughter all take a nice walk around town with our masks on, and we’ll take the dog out. It sometimes feels like I don’t even want to get up because we’re just going to do this over and over again. I’m going to do the same thing over and over and over.

**Story Team:**

It’s Groundhog Day.

**Millie:**

Sometimes I just say to myself, “why bother?” But I still get up, and even if it’s a little bit later in the day, I start the same routine again because I need my daughter to have the same routine so that she understands.

However, I just have to praise God. I have to praise Him for keeping my husband alive. Last week my son turned 32, and my daughter turned 11, and we decided to drive up to them and spend time with all the kids. We felt so blessed to be around them.

**Story Team:**

Millie, you shared so many things with us. Are there any other comments you’d like to add? Maybe words of advice for those in this same situation and feeling scared?

**Millie:**

I think, when you’re going through this, even if you’re just starting out following God, the main thing is just to trust. I wish I had done it sooner but there’s a time for everything and I guess it took this time to teach me to do that because it just felt so good to trust Him.


A Day in the Life: Millie’s Story

We are certainly living in an unprecedented time. It can be a time of fear, of isolation, of loss; but it can also be a time of hope, new relationships, and guidance. Even though connection has changed and is happening in unique ways, connection and support are still available. 

At Hoboken Grace, we want to partner with you and offer you a safe harbor in the wake of this current storm. In order to do that better, we have created the Care and Support page to help connect you with resources to get the love, support, and care you need. 

On the page you’ll find several resources you can access to find connection and care in the way you need the most. 

**Care Calls**

You can schedule a Care Call to receive a phone or video call from one of the members of our pastoral staff. This is an excellent opportunity to have someone reach out to you for prayer, friendly conversation, or just a check-in. 

**Support Groups**

We also have multiple support groups you can join and our groups are all meeting virtually so you can connect wherever you are. Groups vary in scope to meet your needs. We offer a group called [Financial Peace University](https://hobokengrace.com/fpu/) (FPU) which is a great financial resource group. Many at Hoboken Grace have seen their lives change as a result of FPU. Rather than just focusing on lost finances, FPU helps you with all matters related to your financial health; from budgeting to life insurance, to how to eliminate debt. Whether you’ve had to cut back to manage your finances better under the strain of the economic issues right now, or if you just want to set a budget to make sure you’re staying on track, joining an FPU group can help you get your finances in order. 

Crossroads is an addiction support group to help you manage the isolation, anxiety, and depression you may be facing during the quarantine that could affect your sobriety. Whether you need help maintaining your sobriety or you are just beginning the journey towards sobriety, Crossroads is an excellent resource to guide you. 

If you’re new to this whole “God thing” or you’re struggling with doubts and questions, or just seeking your way back to Him, Starting Point is a safe space to ask the tough questions and get honest answers. It is also an excellent place to connect to others who are facing similar issues or questions in their relationship with God. 

If what you really need is simple community and connection, Dinner Groups are, and have always been, an excellent way to connect to others in the Hoboken Grace family and local community. You can forge deep and lasting friendships, get prayer and support, and learn more about God while connecting to a community who will be there for you during this uncertain time. 

**Connectors**

If you are seeking connection or looking for a chance to be of service to your community, our Connectors program is a great outlet. These are different than our Care Calls as they are peer to peer vs Pastoral staff. You can request to be contacted by a Connector who can be there for you and offer prayer, 

conversation, and connection to help minimize loneliness. Or if you want to find a way to serve others and give of your time, you can volunteer to be a Connector who reaches out to others in the community to impact and support them.

**Prayer**

If you just need someone to pray for you or for a loved one, you can submit a virtual prayer request online. Our prayer team and staff pray for all the requests we receive every week and we would love to offer you this comfort and help in bringing your requests to God. 

**Personal Counseling**

Our care staff are available to reach out to you and provide counseling or connect you to our professional counseling resources. If you’re struggling with mental health issues, loss, anxiety, marital strain or just need someone to connect with on a deeper level about spiritual or emotional issues, Personal Counseling is available. 

**Funerals and Weddings**

Even though many of life’s activities are on hold right now, we understand that Weddings and Funerals may not be able to wait. If you need to request one of our pastoral staff members to officiate a wedding or funeral or to discuss your plans for the future, you can also request more information here. 

[**Home Response Plan** ](https://hobokengrace.com/relief/)

We are not just partnering with you to offer care and support for your emotional and spiritual needs, we also want to help you with your physical needs as well. 

We’re helping with food packages as well as business support and personal job searches. We are setting up a benevolence fund to help people with emergency financial needs and much more. To learn more, visit our Home Response Plan page. 

We look forward to hearing from you and helping you find whatever type of support you may need. Even though it may feel like it right now, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. So please, reach out and visit the [Care and Support Page](https://hobokengrace.com/support-2/) to take the first step seeking support; you won’t regret it!


Finding Care and Support in the Wake of Uncertainty

Since March, social distancing has forced us to live life over Zoom, FaceTime, email and snail mail (for those of us who are REALLY bored). It hasn’t stopped us from participating in connection events, but the events had to be online. Online connection events are fun and enjoyable, but nothing beats seeing each other face-to-face. On June 28th our community traded their sweatpants for some real pants as we met at Pier A Park for an afternoon of friendship, smiles, sun, and spike-ball.

Our time at the Pier was a laid back, casual setting which was just what everybody needed to reenter the world of in-person socializing. “It didn’t matter what we did” Nick, Hoboken Grace Community Director told me. “That’s why we planned it at the Pier. We needed a safe place to do nothing, which ended up being more than enough.” Nick is right. Sometimes simple is better. For some of us, it had been over three months since we’ve seen our friends anywhere other than a on computer screen and that was the goal of this whole thing—to reunite and reconnect.

The event really brought home the idea of what it looks like to be a community. Nick summed it up perfectly when he said, “The opportunity to be with our friends in person was really great. I’ve been going to Hoboken Grace events for eleven years, and it was one of the most memorable.” This first in-person event since Covid-19 proved that the people make it special, not the activity.

Even though games were played, it seemed all people wanted to do was catch up and enjoy the sun together. Personally, I kept thinking of the saying “You don’t know what you have until it’s gone.” We’ve all heard a grandparent or Oscar winning movie say it, but it’s true. I love connection events, but I haven’t always made an effort to attend all of them. Usually if they involved food, I was there but often I’d find myself saying, “I’ll make it to the next one for sure!” Until suddenly, there wasn’t a next one; at least one that wasn’t virtual. People I thought I would see next Sunday were suddenly quarantined in another state with family members or sick themselves.

Looking around at everybody having a good time, the general feeling in the air was that this was much needed. John, an attendee, expressed his excitement saying, “As an extrovert the virtual side was helpful, but I definitely noticed something was missing. I realized how much I missed personal interaction. It energizes me and fills me up. Seeing my friends again in person made me feel a bit like my normal self again.”

It comforts me knowing these bonds are so strong that it doesn’t matter what we do or where we are in life. What matters is just being together and giving each other the little bit of energy we need to become whole. I don’t know what future connection events will look like; they could be completely different or return to some form of normal. Whatever the case, I know I won’t take the time I have with my Hoboken Grace family for granted ever again.

Don’t miss your chance to connect either; check out our Events page in the app or on the website to see what future in-person and online [connection events](https://hobokengrace.com/events/) we have coming up!


Face Time (In Real Life)

The last three months have been one of the longest periods of continuous transitioning I’ve ever experienced in my life. When the pandemic hit, I was forced to work from home, then I experienced the unexpected loss of my father to COVID-19, found myself in a new relationship, and inherited a big, slobbery Saint Bernard named Mia. Everything about my life—all of its routines and habits—have been uprooted, completely reshaping what “normal” looks like for me.

It’s easy to get pulled in a lot of different directions, especially when everything is so new and different. That’s why the current series, “Thriving in Transition” has been so relevant for me. Pastor Chris spoke about how the habits formed during the midst of transition will be the habits we keep after transition. It’s also important to be mindful of the habits we are making or the lack of habits we are making. We want to make a conscious effort to form positive habits that will lead to the best version of ourselves, while also bringing us closer to God.

The first new habit that I had to work on was making time with God my first priority. I started waking up 30 minutes earlier to read the bible and create a prayer list for people needing support. This way I would set my mind on God first thing in the morning and connect with His plan for my life. Starting my day off with God helps me to set up a positive rhythm for the whole day. As Paul stated in Colossians 3:2, “Set your mind on things that are above, not on things that are on earth.” (NLT). I realized it is so easy to fall into an unhealthy rhythm for the day. By putting God first, I am able to focus on His needs instead of my own.

The second habit I’ve been working on is saving money. This transition has made me aware of the amount of times I was going out unnecessarily per week. Friends birthday’s, work happy hours, I haven’t seen you in two weeks let’s go out to dinner,etc. But this post Covid-world has made me realize that you can still get together with friends and family in a meaningful way without spending a lot of money. Now I suggest to my friends going for a walk on the waterfront, having a birthday party in a park, or just hanging out on the front stoop. We can still have these great connections, just in a simpler way. Also, having the extra funds in my pocket has allowed me to make donations to various organizations including towards the Home Initiative at Hoboken Grace.

The third habit I have made has been prioritizing Mia’s health. Mia was my father’s therapy dog that I inherited. She was trained by my dad to help people in nursing homes, autistic schools, hospitals, and library reading programs. In order for her be able to help others in the future, I have had to change both of our routines. Our new habit together is walking every morning and evening so that we can keep her healthy and strong. After the pandemic regulations loosen, I’ll be able to become therapy certified so that Mia and I can carry on my dad’s legacy of bringing joy to the people who need it most.

![](https://res.cloudinary.com/dzs7qxusf/image/upload/v1/archive/2020/07/Thriving-in-Transition_Square-for-App-1.jpg)

This transition period has been difficult but also good. The series, [“Thriving in Transition”](https://hobokengrace.com/series/thriving-in-transition/) has allowed me to make a conscious effort to form positive habits during this time of change. I know that once I go back to work and the daily demands of  
my life begin return to what they once were, these new habits will stick and I’ll be able to grow into a better version of myself through my engagement with God and my other healthy new routines. As Pastor Chris has pointed out, our ability to continue to transform our lives is found in creating habits that draw us closer to God. There is nothing we need, nothing we long for, nothing more important than our pursuit of Him


Putting Things Into Place

Have you ever had the feeling that you could be experiencing more of God? It’s this nudge inside of you that suggests there’s more. Sometimes it comes while you are listening to Pastor Chris speak or watching people get baptized or listening to a worship song or sharing with a dinner group friend. 

Perhaps there is no nudge. There is only unrest. A weekend away doesn’t seem to fix that deep unrest that won’t go away. You think it’s just a busy season, but you are starting to suspect it may simply be your life.

I found myself there a few years ago. I wasn’t where I needed to be spiritually to be the wife, mom, friend and leader I was called to be. Everything felt hard ー too hard. Hoboken Grace kept expanding, our family kept growing, and my life kept taking unexpected turns. With every new season, my personal experience of God took a hit until I hit a wall and there was nowhere left to turn but to Him. I knew that if I was going to be who He has called me to be I needed Him. Not just on Sunday, not just in dinner group ー every day in every season.

One habit I implemented that DRASTICALLY impacted my experience of God was taking one day away with God every three months. Yes, a full day away. It took some time to get used to (the first time I made it two hours before I called a friend and asked her what I should do). Now the day flies by, and I often wish it could be longer. In case you want to give it a try, here’s what a typical day away with God can look like:

1. Schedule the day the way you would schedule any other important event. It doesn’t get moved just because another event came up.
2. Start the day with whatever helps you clear your mind. Maybe that’s taking a walk or bike ride. Maybe it’s yoga. For me it’s always a workout. It may sound odd, but it helps my mind STOP when I push my body to its limits physically. I also listen to worship songs and let my mind be consumed by thoughts of Him.
3. Once there, my time with God follows a rhythm of confession (ways I know I am not being who I am created to be), gratitude (acknowledging everything good in my life is a gift from Him), and time with a Bible and journal. Spending time in God’s word is CRUCIAL because it is a letter written with you in mind and He has something to share through it. Your journal is so you can write out what is on your heart and where you are. Writing it down helps you stay focused.
4. Halfway through, do something you enjoy WITH God that brings you rest. God is fun and He would LOVE to enjoy His time with you. He will meet you anywhere! I have gone to the beach, to the spa or to my favorite lunch spot with Him. You may be wondering what “with Him” means. For me, it’s that I keep doing my reading while having lunch or I talk to Him the way I would with a friend. If you are new to that it will take some time, but I promise you will get there.
5. Go back to your Bible and journal. I try to end the day by asking Him who He wants me to pray for or encourage. He often brings someone to mind throughout the day, and so this is the time I take to reach out to that person. I can’t tell you how many times the response I get back is, “This is exactly what I needed today. Thank you!”

This may seem too time-consuming, and I completely understand that fear! It seems counterproductive and even selfish. But if you’re tired of getting the nudge without doing anything about it, if you want ACTUAL rest from the One who knows you best – give it a shot. 

You can even do it with friends who want to try it with you. Doing it with a friend means you come back at the end of your alone time and you share what you read, what you heard, what you experienced. Friendships like that are a lifeline and will help deepen your experience of God.

_Hoboken Grace has resources available to help you in your journey with God – [RightNow Media](https://accounts.rightnow.org/Account/Invite/hobokengrace?returnUrl=https://www.rightnowmedia.org/Account/Media/InviteReturn) (free access to a library of video studies), [Rhythms](http://hobokengrace.com/rhythms/) (a way to build daily habits, also found in our app), [Axiom](https://hobokengrace.churchcenter.com/registrations/events/147651) (a weekend retreat), and all [past messages](http://hobokengrace.com/podcast/)._


Take a Day


Every month we talk about incorporating rhythms into our lives in order to engage with God throughout the day. But new habits don’t develop overnight. We often must first acknowledge and embrace the challenges that keep us from hearing how God is speaking into our lives. Here are five guidelines if you’re struggling to develop rhythms that lead to a meaningful conversation with Him. To assist with this, we also create monthly rhythms for our community to make our engagement with God a consistent part of our day. These rhythms can be found [here](https://hobokengrace.com/rhythms/) on our website or on our app.

**1). Start small**

Rome wasn’t built in a day and neither are daily habits. Be patient with yourself and aware of what is and isn’t a realistic addition to your routine. If you already find it difficult to pray first thing in the morning ― whether it’s because you have kids or because you’re usually scrambling to get out the door ― trying to make prayer work at that time will likely just lead to disappointment.

Instead, build new habits around old habits. Evaluate the places where God Time can complement your already established routine. Maybe it’s during the hour you have carved out for lunch, or during your kids’ naptime. Or maybe prayer fits into your morning run and also during your commute home. If you’re struggling to make something stick, try starting with something simple, like engaging with God for a few minutes every time you brush your teeth. Then expand the conversation to other parts of your day.

**2). Work on changing the conversation**

In Thessalonians, Paul tells us to be joyful and pray continually. Paul is calling on us to change the conversation. Instead of talking to yourself all day, talk to Him ― just as you would talk to a friend. If you find the conversation drifting back to you (and you likely will), try exercising that muscle through journaling. Instead of journaling for yourself, write as if you were talking to God.

**3). Tame your wandering mind**

Create space to talk to Him with limited distractions. Pinpoint where your mind is going instead and try eliminating it. If you find yourself staring at dirty laundry and dishes in the sink, head to a coffee shop or the pier. And if it’s your phone that’s distracting you, leave it at home.

If your mind is still going elsewhere, find something to rein it in. For those who find it particularly difficult to sit still and focus, try meditating on His word with scripture-based adult coloring books (yes, really). Coloring reduces activity in the amygdala ― where our worries and other stress-induced emotions originate ― and is a meditation unto itself. While your mind might still wander, it can’t go far. So try dreaming and creating alongside God while illustrating scripture. As an added bonus, you’ll probably memorize a new verse by the time you’re done.

**4). Set reminders**

If you struggle with forgetfulness (as we all do), try creating reminders for yourself, at least until a new rhythm becomes a full-fledged habit. To help in establishing these rhythms, we created a way to set-up daily reminders through the [Hoboken Grace App](https://hobokengrace.com/appdownload/). Here is a quick step by step to get started:

1. Download the Hoboken Grace App on your phone.
2. Go to the three horizontal lines at the top left corner.
3. Go to settings and then notifications.
4. Here you can choose to set up notifications for our monthly rhythms.

Once completed you will begin to receive three notifications each day. At 8am a reminder about the daily bible reading plan, as we walk through the new testament together in a year. Along with this notification you can also join us live on the app for Anthony and Chris in the Morning, also at 8am, as we walk through and engage in this reading together. Then at 12pm you will get a notification that will take you to our meditation passage for the month. This will be an opportunity for all of us to take a moment in our day and stop what we are doing to engage God in prayer over this passage. Finally, at 4:30pm, before our day comes to an end, a reminder will be sent regarding the memory verse for the month which will give you another chance to stop and reflect on God’s word.

**5). Own your failure**

You know when you forget to return someone’s call or email, then avoid that person out of guilt when you run into them? Don’t let that be your relationship with God.

Inevitably, your daily to-do’s will get in the way. So when you fail to engage with God, own up to that failure and release any guilt that comes with it. Because when you move closer to God, God will move closer to you.


Five Tips If You’re Struggling to Develop Rhythms

**Opening the Door to Volunteering**

After moving to the area, Justin and Fernanda felt disconnected from their new community. What helped change that, they say, was helping others adjust to their own new surroundings. 

After seeing an ad on Instagram, Justin and Fernanda began volunteering with The Open Door, a nonprofit organization focused on strengthening communities and immigrant families through classes in English as a second language, mathematics, children’s literacy and computers. Anyone can matriculate to the classes, and the best part is that they are completely free. The group aims to empower immigrant families to reach their “God-given potential.” Between their two locations, 300 people participate in the program. 

For the first six months, Fernanda was volunteering as a teaching assistant to another teacher. When the teacher had to move on to another class, Fernanda began teaching herself. Because it was such a big class of basic-level students learning English, Fernanda got her husband involved as well.

“We didn’t have any teaching experience before volunteering there and we have been learning as we go,” Fernanda said. “But there is a curriculum that we can follow and it is pretty straight-forward. The most important thing really is to love the students and create a safe space for them to grow in community.”

On a typical evening, Justin and Fernanda arrive at Nazereth Baptist Church in West New York at 7 p.m. to teach level 4 (most advanced) English once a week. The teacher from the previous day will email them where she stopped in the book and they will then follow from there. They try to mix in writing, speaking and reading exercises, then take a 15-minute break to listen to a Bible story or a motivational speech. After speaking only English so the students can practice with them, the night ends at 8:30 p.m.

[![](https://res.cloudinary.com/dzs7qxusf/image/upload/v1/archive/2019/05/opendoor3-1024x683.jpg)](https://res.cloudinary.com/dzs7qxusf/image/upload/v1/archive/2019/05/opendoor3.jpg)

Volunteering with The Open Door has been a life-changing experience, the couple says they now feel like part of the community. They even run into their students on the street and get introduced to their families. 

Volunteering has also helped them become closer to God. The students are a constant inspiration, Justin and Fernanda say. As they get to know them better, they hear about their journeys. It has not been easy for many of the students, but they are so faithful that it motivates Justin and Fernanda and boosts their own faith in Him. 

Even their Dinner Group has gotten involved, visiting one night in March for “Conversation Night.” They had some questions written down, but it was not necessary to use them because the conversation flowed quite easily. Some of the topics included the experience of living in a different country with a different culture, favorite foods and what they liked to do for fun when they were kids. Justin and Fernanda describe it as a very emotional evening because the students truly felt loved and were excited to see that this group was paying attention to them and wanted to get to know them. For their Dinner Group, the experience overflowed with love and kindness. For Justin and Fernanda, it was a great opportunity to love their students and to get to know them better. It was also a great opportunity to love their Dinner Group and give them the chance to get to know this special group of students. 

_To learn more about The Open Door and other local partners that we work with and how you can get involved [click here](https://hobokengrace.com/local-partners/)._


The Open Door

**Can you relate to any of the following?**

* You decided to try living clean/sober again and really want to make it stick this time. You’re concerned though as past strategies haven’t worked so you are willing to try something new.
* You are recently clean/sober and are interested in expanding the spiritual side of your recovery.
* Your recovery program is working but given all that’s going on it is getting tougher each day. You would like some additional support.
* You have been sober and/or clean for a while and would like to support others at the start of their recovery journey while refreshing your own program.

If you answered yes to any of the above, I can assure you that you are not alone! I know because not only have I answered yes to each of these questions myself, but I’m also part of a support group Hoboken Grace has started called Crossroads to help all others who can relate. 

My name is David and my Crossroads journey began 23 years ago. For the first 6-plus years, I battled with whether or not I really had a problem with alcohol. After finally admitting that the answer was yes, I agreed to attend an intensive outpatient program and then a 12-step program. Over time, I came to realize that to remain clean and sober, I needed to confront the question I had been avoiding for so many years, namely who God was to me. After struggling for several years, finally, through regular meetings with a local pastor, I slowly found my way back to God and began a journey of building a relationship with Him.

After gradually slipping into an auto-pilot recovery program for about 10 years, several very vivid drunk dreams really shook me. They made me acutely aware that I needed to find a way to better integrate my recovery experiences with my spiritual life as well as do more to help others with their recovery journeys because I know that it is by giving that I receive.

 Through a variety of what I believe were God-directed events; Hoboken Grace connections and working with Pastor Anthony; I found my answer – establishing a Crossroads Support Group at Hoboken Grace. Crossroads is a step by step guide away from addictions. The original intent was to pilot a group later this year, but with Covid-19 causing many to live in isolation, a real enemy of sobriety, we decided to launch the first group several days after the Hoboken “stay at home” announcement. Five weeks in, our group of 8 is going strong. We are supporting each other in staying clean and sober and growing in our relationships with God. 

Thinking back over the past 23 years, somewhat implausibly I have come to believe that my addiction was one of the best things that could have happened to me. Crazy maybe, but without it I never would have stopped running away from God and avoiding Him, and never found the forgiving and loving God with whom I have a growing relationship today. 

If you would like to learn more about Crossroads and/or how we can support you in your recovery, **on a confidential basis**, email: [Crossroads@hobokengrace.com](mailto:Crossroads@hobokengrace.com)


At a Crossroads with Drugs and/or Alcohol?


We all have our morning routines, whether we are the “early riser” type ready to take on the day, or the “2 cups of coffee before speaking” type, mornings tend to set the tone on how the rest of our day will shape out. That is why it is important to start it on a positive note; no matter what type we are!

When Hoboken Grace introduced ‘Anthony & Chris in the Morning’ I quickly knew the show was going to become part of my routine. Not only has it become routine, but it is that exact “positive note” we all need during what could feel like the start to another uncertain day.

The dynamic of the show is great! First, we get a dose full of laughter while Anthony and Chris banter back and forth about whatever topics tend to surface that morning. Then, we have a devotional for the day that always takes us to scripture and such a great conversation around what Jesus is telling or showing us through His words and actions.

![](https://res.cloudinary.com/dzs7qxusf/image/upload/v1/archive/2020/05/Coffee-Icon_Morning-Prayer.jpg)

However, I have to say, there is one extremely unique part about the show to me and that is the chat functionality that is available to the viewers of the show. Hoboken Grace is known for its community engagement and this quarantine has not impeded those efforts to continue to connect to us all. The chat makes us feel like we are all in the same room together; checking in on each other, laughing together, and engaging in God’s word together. To provide an example, I want to share an amazing experience that came to fruition because of the chat.

One morning, Anthony and Chris somehow got on the topic of movies that are meant for children but are actually scary rather than kid-friendly. Some examples mentioned in the chat included Mulan (specifically, the Huns!), the witch from Snow White, and Pinocchio. Pinocchio stopped me for a minute because I remember being terrified of the scene where Pinocchio gets swallowed by a whale!

Suddenly, I felt God tapping me on the shoulder. Earlier in the week, my dinner group discussed the question: “What are some examples in scripture where people faced unexpected circumstances?” Through this engagement with the community, God was showing me another amazing example. After reviewing Jonah 1-2, I quickly picked up my phone to share this message with my dinner group.

After reviewing the story of Jonah (by actually watching a children’s video online), I shared with my group that in this story, Jonah was trying to hide from God when he decided to get on a boat. The boat was soon rocked by a large storm and Jonah was thrown into the ocean and was swallowed by a whale! Jonah lived in the belly of this whale for 3 days and 3 nights. He prayed to God every day which gave him strength, but there were so many nights Jonah thought he would never see the light of day again. On the fourth day, the whale opened his mouth and spit Jonah out onto the shore. God spoke to him and said “You cannot hide from me! Whatever you do, I am with you all the time!”

There are so many days during this quarantine where we may feel like Jonah; like we will never see the light of day again, but we always need to remember to call on God for He is with us all the time. When we engage in conversation with God and those in our community, our eyes become open to things we never thought we would be able to see.

I encourage you to start your day off right and join me, and the rest of our community, online every day at 10:00am ET to engage in the conversation. Click [HERE](https://subsplash.com/hobokengrace/lb/ms/+x22pwpn) to listen anytime!


“Anthony & Chris in the Morning” — Have You Tuned In Yet?

This past Sunday was the last message in a series called “Lost and Found.” The whole series was specifically impactful for me, but this past Sunday I was reminded of something that God showed me 3 years ago. It was something that I have had a hard time explaining to others and believing it to be true myself.

Three years ago, my mom went to the doctor for a sore throat and was diagnosed with cancer. It was an aggressive cancer that had metastasized, and she was given 4-6 months to live. Losing my mom was something I had come to fear because many years earlier my sister had tragically passed away at the age of 24\. It was my worst nightmare to think about losing another immediate family member and it had become reality.

My mother passed away six months after she was diagnosed. When she was diagnosed, I left the life I had in Hoboken to go live with her and take care of her in every way possible. Every day was a race to save her life. She had to endure chemo and radiation, along with awful surgeries that caused her to lose the ability to eat and talk. My mother was sick and frail and in a lot of pain constantly. There was medicine to give, bandages to change, and IV’s to manage. My whole life at that time was about taking care of my mom. It was one of the most excruciatingly painful and devastating experiences to watch and to experience with her.

But this past Sunday, when Pastor Chris talked about Elijah’s story, I was reminded of that time in my life where I experienced a light in the darkness and hope in the pain that could not be explained. During those six months, I had times where I felt at peace. I remember calling my friend and telling her,“I know my mom is going to die, but I feel a deep sense of peace. I don’t understand how this is possible!” Even now, I struggle to communicate exactly how I was feeling. How was it possible that I could experience a deep sense of peace in my soul during such a horrifying time in my life? It made NO sense to me. But just like Elijah, I had questions for God during that time;a LOT of questions! How could He let this happen? Would my mom live? Was He doing this for a reason and if so, what reason would EVER be good enough? Why couldn’t He stop the pain? If God loved my mom, why wouldn’t He stop it all? If He was good, why was this happening? And just like Elijah, I didn’t get the answers to my questions. But still, I experienced peace.

When my mom was diagnosed, I was terrified and thought that I would lose all hope. But just like God sent an angel to gently care for Elijah, He did the same for me. God knew that journey would be too much for me, He knew I couldn’t do it alone. He put friends in my life to hold my hand the whole way through and He led me through the darkness. There wasn’t a moment during that time where I felt alone. I was taken care of every step of the way. My questions weren’t answered, and my circumstances didn’t change, but I still had peace. It was a sense of peace that I was deeply loved, never alone, and that I would be okay. There were even moments where I was rejoicing and I know now that was a result of God’s presence in my life.

“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need and thank Him for all He has done.Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus”.

Phil 4:6-7

To this day, that peace has stayed with me. Sure, I have times of sadness, longing and pain, but my heart is settled regardless of my circumstances.

In his message, Pastor Chris mentioned a song called “It Is Well with My Soul” written by Horatio G. Spafford.

“When peace like a river, attendeth my way, When sorrows like sea billows roll; Whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say, It is well, it is well, with my soul. It is well with my soul, It is well, it is well with my soul”

The writer had experienced great loss as well. It was written after he lost his son and then his four daughters. This was the same song that my mother requested to be played at her funeral.

Elijah and the author of this song learned that even in the midst of physical anguish and great emotional pain you can still know peace at the core of your soul. Peace that is beyond understanding that is a result of God’s presence in our lives and now, I know that too.


Beyond Understanding


March 11th marked the day in Hoboken when our lives began to change due to covid19\. Life just hasn’t been the same since. For some, the change has been devastating, others are finding ways to cope but it’s not easy. Social distancing, financial hardship, and health concerns have all impacted our community and nation in various ways.

How have people been dealing with everything? How are they managing their spiritual, physical, and emotional health? What is life like right now and how will things be when they begin to shift back to normalcy? We recently interviewed some members of our Hoboken Grace family to check-in with them and see how their daily lives have changed, how they’re coping, and how they are finding ways to connect in this unprecedented time.

**Alex and Lauren- Late 20’s, Hoboken, NJ**

Alex and Lauren are married, Hoboken residents. Alex works in business development for a chemical company and Lauren works as brand manager for a food company. When things began to look dire and a shut-down eminent, Alex and Lauren knew that quarantining in their small Hoboken apartment with limited space and no outdoor access was untenable. Having the green-light to work from home, they decided to leave Hoboken early in the crisis and on the weekend of March 14th, they headed south for Lauren’s family cabin near Lake Hartwell in Georgia. This bucolic escape would provide them with the necessary isolation as well as a healthy injection of nature and space to quarantine as peacefully as possible. It would also however go on for longer than they originally anticipated and make them feel an unexpected longing for their Hoboken community and desire to have been potentially useful in the on-the-ground efforts the community was engaging in.

**Story Team**

Do you guys regret your decision to leave town and did you anticipate that it would be for as long as it has been?

**Lauren**: I’m very happy with our decision to leave Hoboken, especially with seeing how crazy everything has gotten and all the stay-at-home orders and extreme measures being taken. We only thought we’d be gone a couple weeks and didn’t pack enough clothes to stay for this long but we’re managing.

**Alex:** I’m mostly happy with the decision. I love the extra space and being in nature and getting to see Lauren’s parents who come up on the weekends and I’m very happy with the amount we get to exercise. But I do miss out on the service activities that we could be doing for the community and the ways I’ve seen some of our dinner group members volunteering and serving.

**Lauren:** Yeah and the nightly clapping and cheering for the first responders everyone is doing in Hoboken is really cool and the community feel, we miss being part of that.

Luckily for Alex and Lauren they have been able to continue to work from home and have suffered no pay loss or financial hardship yet. They have however suffered some loss of continuity in work methods and changes to their tasks. Alex, whose job involves a lot of traveling to visit clients, now involves virtually contacting those clients. Lauren has lost a valuable collaboration aspect of her job by not being able to interact with her co-workers in-person on projects in the same manner.

**Alex:** Chemical companies have been hit hard by the virus but luckily my company is a European company and they are committed to trying to keep everyone employed. We weren’t really set-up for a work-from-home model so they’ve had to adapt and change things as we go to make it work.

**Story Team:** How are you managing your routine and transition, balancing your work time with your non-working time?Alex: We have set up a place in the house where we each do work and when I want to take a break from work, I leave that spot.

**Lauren:** We also try to stick to the same schedule and work for the same hours.

**Alex:** I have enjoyed that all the time I used to spend commuting I now use for exercise or outdoors time.

**Story Team:** How are you balancing your spiritual routine? Are you taking time for God and your spiritual health? Have there been any changes to your time with God during this?

**Lauren:** Before I used to use my commute for time with God. I would listen to worship music or talk with God. I’ve obviously lost that time but I feel like the time we get to spend in nature has been helpful. I like to get outside and connect with God through the beauty we get to see every day. I take that time outdoors to reflect and pray and listen. Sometimes they’re micro-moments of appreciating His gift of nature and beauty and other times it’s a longer conversation with God.

**Alex:** I started doing the daily Bible reading plan that Hoboken Grace does about a year ago. I used to do it during breakfast at home so I continue to do it during breakfast here. I also enjoy the routine of still doing dinner group every Monday night. I’m also finding God in the micro-moments in nature.

**Lauren:** As a couple we also watch the services every week, pray together everyday and work on dinner group studies throughout the week. Sometimes it’s hard because our time isn’t as structured but we try to keep up our spiritual rhythms as much as possible.

**Story Team:** What has it been like having the connection to dinner group virtually? For you Alex, you actually travel a lot normally and have to miss dinner group, but now you get to be part of it still even through you’re away. Has that been better for you or are you both missing the face-to-face time?

**Alex**: Just like it is when I’m visiting a customer, face time is invaluable. So, I think making those personal connections is really hard to replace if you’re not standing right next to someone. I certainly appreciate the time we get to spend connecting on Zoom but I can’t wait to go back to the personal interactions. But this has also illustrated to me that in the future when I’m travelling again, I want to try to connect virtually and maybe dial-in to the dinner group because I realize it is really important.

**Lauren:** Like Alex said, you can’t really replace the in-person time but it has been really nice to attend with Alex. Where normally, when he would be travelling, it would be just me alone so getting to attend with him consistently has been great.

**Story Team:** If you guys didn’t have dinner group and that weekly connection during this time how do you think you’d be feeling? Is group a valuable outlet for you in this moment?

**Lauren:** Yeah, it’s been such a great outlet to be able to come together and share our unique experiences and laugh together and pray together with the group. We’re lucky to be in a really peaceful location so we’re maybe not as stressed as others but when you see all the stuff on the news about New York and New Jersey and how bad things are, it’s really reassuring to see that everyone in group seems to be doing well and is healthy and maintaining their faith in God.

**Alex:** All the things about group before Covid still hold, that dinner group is still community and without it, even virtually, I’d really be missing that connection to the community.

**Story Team:** You both serve on Grace Kids, what has it been like for you to lose that service or have it change during this time?

**Alex:** Our team is doing weekly check-in calls so they’re staying connected that way, but I have missed the ability to be able to serve my community. We can see each other virtually and connect but we’re not serving and that is hard.

**Lauren:** I know they’re doing virtual Grace Kids right now but I haven’t been able to participate in that. So, losing the chance to serve has been hard because that’s one of the callings God gave us that we’ve been missing right now.

Story Team: What has been the biggest takeaway from all this? Is there anything you will continue going forward that you’ve benefited from in this time?

**Alex:** I’ve really appreciated all the quality time I’ve gotten to spend with Lauren. With my job and all the travel I normally do, I don’t get to spend this much time with her so we will try to do as much as we can together still when it is all over. Lauren: Yeah, we will be cherishing our time together more because Alex is on the road a lot so we will try to make the most the quality time afterwards. We also appreciate our health a lot more, this situation makes you value that.

**Story Team:** What has been your biggest struggle through all of this?

**Alex:** Trying to stay focused on the positive. In the beginning you couldn’t turn on the TV without hearing a negative story about the virus. It’s been important to get away from the TV and negative news. We’re trying to focus on the positive stories coming out of this, the volunteers, the people helping each other, etc. Those positive moments help get us through and take away the negative thoughts.

**Lauren:** The hardest part for me has been staying motivated at work, there’s a lot of negativity, my job has changed as it’s mostly emailing now and I don’t get to see my co-workers in-person. A lot of the fun aspects of my job have changed too, like going to trade shows and big projects now put on hold.

**Story Team:** What specific tools or methods are you trying to utilize to ease that suffering?

**Alex:** We definitely don’t watch as much TV and I don’t read news as regularly. It’s good to be informed but setting a limit so you don’t get overwhelmed. And whenever I’m talking to someone and they’re focused on the doom and gloom, I try to find ways to encourage them to see the positive. Encouraging others has helped me to stay positive myself.

**Lauren:** For me, I try to remind myself that I do have a job and to be grateful as that’s not the case for a lot of people. Also talking to family and friends and seeing that everyone is going through this and if they can get through it, I can get through it. Also praying and the Lost and Found series we’ve been walking through at church has really helped put things into perspective.

**Story Team:** What about connection to your family? Are you finding opportunities to connect with them?

**Alex:** Absolutely, we get to see Lauren’s family on the weekends when they come up and we FaceTime with my parents every week.

**Lauren:** I got to do a video call with my grandmother and my seven cousins which was great. We had never done that before and my grandma was so encouraged to see us all doing so well, she had been worried how we were all doing. I was surprised how easy it was to arrange the call with all of them and we haven’t all been together at once for years so it was really cool. It’s something we’ll likely continue even after all this. It’s crazy it took a pandemic to make it happen but it’s showed us the importance of it.

**Alex:** I think we’ve realized through this the importance of connecting and we will continue to make that a priority with our family when all this is over. I’m sure we’ll talk to Lauren’s parents and mine a lot more in the future.

**Story Team:** What is your benchmark for coming back to Hoboken and how do you think you’ll handle the getting back to life? Will you proceed with caution or just jump right back into normal life?

**Alex:** We plan to come back once our offices reopen and when my company allows me to travel again. If they make us wear masks in the office, I’ll probably stay home.

**Lauren:** My office is pretty conservative so they won’t let us come back unless it’s totally safe.

**Alex:** I don’t necessarily feel at risk if I get the virus as I don’t have any pre-existing conditions, but I would be worried about being contagious to others so I’ll go back to life but will still be cautious and take precautions to try to prevent infection.

**Story Team:** What’s the one thing you’re most looking forward to when life gets back to normal?

**Alex:** I’m looking forward to seeing people again and not being afraid of the virus, being able to have conversations again face to face and just connecting.

Alex and Lauren continue to quarantine in Georgia and plan to remain there for the foreseeable future but like the rest of us, they are anxious for life to regain some normalcy so they can return home soon.


A Day in the Life Alex and Lauren

March 11th marked the day in Hoboken when our lives began to change due to covid19\. Life just hasn’t been the same since. For some, the change has been devastating, others are finding ways to cope but it’s not easy. Social distancing, financial hardship, and health concerns have all impacted our community and nation in various ways.

How have people been dealing with everything? How are they managing their spiritual, physical, and emotional health? What is life like right now and how will things be when they begin to shift back to normalcy? We recently interviewed some members of our Hoboken Grace family to check-in with them and see how their daily lives have changed, how they’re coping, and how they are finding ways to connect in this unprecedented time.

**Christen- Early 30’s, Bayonne, NJ**

_Christen is a married resident of Bayonne. Christen works as a Client Analyst for AYCO, a division of Goldman Sachs. Her Husband Brett works for FEMA and is often deployed to different disaster zones around the US and its territories. In the early stages of the Corona Virus crisis when New York State was being inundated, Brett was deployed to Albany to help with the on-the-ground response. When her office moved to remotely working in the middle of March, Christen took advantage of the opportunity to join Brett on his deployment and went to Albany to be with him. She has been up there ever since while Brett deals directly with the disaster as a front-lines worker. Separated from family, friends, and home, and living in an extended-stay hotel, Christen’s life has been altered. She spoke about the changes and what it’s been like balancing her work, health, and spiritual rhythms all while being the wife of a first responder who is working 12-hour days on the front lines._

**Story Team:** What has your work life been like during this time, have you suffered any cutbacks or loss of income?

**Christen:** Initially there was concern that those of us who work in my role at the various locations wouldn’t be able to adopt a work-from-home model. What we do is very hands-on with the clients and they weren’t sure it’d translate with that and all the mailing, physical data, and printing we do. However, they’ve actually seen an increase in productivity and were impressed how well we were all able to handle the transition. I think it may change the flexibility in my role going forward and possibly offer more chances to work from home in the future when things return to normal.

**Story Team:** What has it been like for you as the wife of a first responder? You’ve gotten to witness first hand now, for the first time what his job is like and his stress and responsibilities during a disaster deployment. Are you concerned for his safety and has it altered your perception of what he goes through?

**Christen:** I think it’s been a better situation than we expected. It was a huge stress reliever for me to get out of New Jersey and come be with him. Our concern for him was what work/life balance would look like when he’s working 10-12 hour days.  
Even though my time with him is limited, it’s more than it would have been when he’s deployed as I normally don’t get to join him. I’ve also learned a lot. Usually we FaceTime when he’s working a disaster and now, he gets to come home to me. It’s changed my perception of what he does, I appreciate it more and see how mentally taxing his job is.

**Story Team:** What has the change in your daily routines and work-life been for you, especially since you’re in a hotel and not your home?

**Christen:** It’s made me appreciate the little things, like I miss having an oven! I never thought I’d say that but I miss it. I have a better office situation working here than I would have had at home but I definitely didn’t bring enough stuff to occupy my non-working time. I’m trying to keep as much of a normal routine as possible. I don’t have a commute anymore so during that time I’m using it as my personal time. Normally when he’s travelling, we use my morning commute as a chance to connect so we use the same time to connect now. We also try to eat and do our regular activities in the normal timing as much as possible. I still try to work the same hours and wake up at about the same time.

**Story Team:** What are you doing for your spiritual health and routines? Are you scheduling time for God?

**Christen:** I found that it’s not been as consistent. In the beginning, I wasn’t sure where to fit that in but now I’ve begun to adjust. When you’re used to how you fit things in and your schedule is disrupted, it takes a little bit of time to get a new rhythm. I usually have about 1-11/2 hours between when I finish work and Brett finishes so I use that time now. It would have been by commute home before but now I use that time to connect with God.

**Story Team:** You’re in a dinner group, what has the connection been like doing virtual group versus in-person? With Brett travelling so much you often come to group alone, but now you both get to attend virtually. Has that been worth the trade-off from the in-person group?

**Christen:** It’s fun to get to experience this new scenario of virtual dinner group with Brett as he’s normally unable to join when he’s deployed. It makes us both appreciate it more when we do get to connect to the group in person. The virtual option has been great to keep the routine consistent but it makes you miss the opportunity to come in person.

**Story Team:** You serve on the Hospitality Team. What has been the loss there for you, not being able to serve and how are you still connecting to your team right now?Christen: For my team it’s been a big change to not be able to serve and love on our community in the same way. It’s a big loss of who we are and what we do, so it’s a big shift. We still have two virtual team huddles every Sunday, we pray for the services before they start and when they’re done, we all pray together.  
We’ve been discussing how we can stay connected to serve better and what our vision will look like when we come back together. We’ve also been discussing what things will look like when we have service again and what changes and safety measures we may take for hospitality when we finally get to open again. We’re open-ended right now as we don’t know what will happen in the future or what will specifically be needed, but we’re talking about it. The great thing is we are at least staying connected with huddles and virtual team parties.

**Story Team:** What do you think things would be like for you right now if you weren’t connected to a dinner group or a team?

**Christen:** Honestly, really lonely. I think it keeps me grounded and gives me a sense of routine and normalcy too. You can have friends and family you’re connecting with, which is obviously very much needed, but I think because the Hoboken Grace family is so much a part of Brett and my everyday family routine, we see them more than we see our family and other friends, so it makes us feel so supported to connect with our church family still.

**Story Team:** What about connecting with them makes you feel the most supported?

Christen: I think it’s just being able to see everyone and talk with them about how we are all sharing this really unique situation and all having to figure out the new normal were transitioning to. It also helps you not wallow in your own struggles.

**Story Team:** Speaking of struggles, you have a personal family struggle right now. Your sister and her husband have had the adoption of their son put on hold with the courts shutting down and on top of that, your brother-in-law lost his job due to cutbacks as a result of the virus. What has that been like for you not being able to support them directly and having to watch them go through that?

**Christen:** The timing was pretty uncanny. They were supposed to have had their adoption finalized by now and have his dedication at their church in April and we had already scheduled travel plans to attend but all of that got put on hold. We were all really looking forward to that so it was hard. I’m still connecting with them and my nephew a lot virtually but it’s sad. Also, with my brother-in-law losing his employment it makes them concerned if he will secure new employment and not disrupt their finances and impact the adoption in any way. The only blessing-in-disguise is that they have a lot of time together as a family they normally wouldn’t get with their work schedules. My brother-in-law has gotten to be a full-time dad and see what that is like which he has loved, and he was able to get unemployment quicker than most, so God has taken care of them.

**Story Team:** Have you missed quarantining away from home and not being in your community right now?

**Christen:** When we first got up here it was like we had moved again as I had to get used to the new area. The nice thing is Brett has his work team up here with him so they had adopted me into their community and I have been able to connect with them. I miss home but it’s been ok. It’s been weird to be disconnected from what’s going on back home and living vicariously through my friends in Hoboken.

**Story Team:** What is the biggest takeaway you’ve learned from this whole experience?

**Christen:** I think I’ve learned to look for the positive even though there’s been aspects of this situation that have not been ideal. Living in a hotel right now isn’t ideal but I have enjoyed being with Brett. Being with a community of Brett’s co-workers has been a blessing. Having a dinner group to look forward to meeting with every week is great. It doesn’t matter how we’re meeting; I still look forward to it. So, I’m learning to find the positives in those little moments.

**Story Team:** What’s the first thing you want to do when life gets back to normal?

**Christen:** We’re just dying to get back to normal and seeing our friends and go out in the community. I also really miss my team and I can’t wait to get back to serving with them and seeing them in person on a regular basis. We just miss people and have just been so focused on our four walls so we’re looking forward to getting back out there in the world again!

_Since this interview Brett’s deployment has ended and they were able to return home. Also, Christen’s brother-in-law found a new job and they found out that their adoption would go through virtually in June. Christen and Brett are back in Bayonne working from home and waiting for things to get back to normal._


A Day In the Life of Christen

The last five weeks have been challenging as my wife and I balance working from home with a toddler and a baby. On one hand, I am incredibly thankful that we both have the opportunity to work remotely. We have an apartment with space to balance naps, play time and work time. It has also afforded us the opportunity to spend time as a family that I would not have otherwise. 

The other day, I had just finished playing trucks and trains with my son inside of the awesome (if I say so myself) fort we built. It was time for my wife and I to switch responsibilities so I could join a work call. As I walked toward my room, my son sprinted across the living room and wrapped his arms around my legs. He said, “No work daddy! I need you to play with me.” 

I joined the call, but my mind was lost in the pleading requests of my son. During this new existence, trying to balance life in my own way and through my own strength has impacted my daily devotional time. In that moment, I could not help but think about my heavenly Father and how He wants to spend time with me, just as my son wanted to be with his father. 

“Come to me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

_Matthew 11:28-29 (NIV)_ 

Throughout scripture, we see this truth play out in many ways and circumstances. In John 4, Jesus meets the women at the well even though she was an outcast of society. In Act 9, we see Jesus move in Saul’s life even though he is working on destroying the new church. Jesus continually meets people where they are and spends time with them. 

“Come near to God and He will come near to you.”

_James 4:8a (NIV)_

We do not need special words or phrases to come near to God. He is pursuing each of us and He is ready for us to come to Him at any moment. When I experienced crisis years ago, it helped me find my way back to God. Perhaps this is your opportunity to find your way back to the one who loves you most. 

![](https://res.cloudinary.com/dzs7qxusf/image/upload/v1/archive/2020/05/Rhythms.png)The following resources help remind me of this truth, daily. 

* Hoboken Grace Bible Plan – [hobokengrace.com/bible](http://hobokengrace.com/bible)
* Hoboken Gracey Rhythms – [hobokengrace.com/rhythms](http://hobokengrace.com/rhythms)
* Chris and Anthony in the Morning – [live.hobokengrace.com](http://live.hobokengrace.com)

If you have questions about faith, Hoboken Grace launches Starting Point groups throughout the year! The groups are an 8-week series designed for those who are brand new to faith, returning to it, or just have questions and doubts. It’s a safe place, without judgement, where you can ask the questions you think you’re not supposed to ask in church. 

* Sign Up for Starting Point – [hobokengrace.com/startingpoint](http://hobokengrace.com/startingpoint)


Time with God

Hoboken Grace Launches Plan to Show Love to the Community

Home Response Plan created to assist Local Community

At Hoboken Grace, we have recently launched the Home Response Plan offering a variety of assistance programs to the community. We are allotting $440k to be utilized for the implementation of this plan and have partnered with volunteers, professionals, and other community members to open free services and resources to Hoboken community members in need. With so many having been affected, during this time, by changes in their lives including unemployment, reduction in wages, and homeschooling. We are passionate about sharing a sense of “home” with our city through a wide assortment of opportunities.

“From the beginning, Hoboken Grace has been about serving. We believe we’ve been loved in a powerful way, and we have a responsibility to share that love with those around us. We want to do all we can to love our neighbors as best as we can.” – Hoboken Grace Pastor Chris High.

These are just a few of the initiatives launching over the next two weeks. You can sign-up for assistance or to volunteer for any of these programs at [Hobokengrace.com/relief/](http://Hobokengrace.com/relief/).

FOOD PACKAGES

We are compiling food packages that will be available to those in our community who are experiencing food shortages due to lack of income and employment caused by COVID-19\. It is our goal to make these packages available to thousands within our community, specifically targeting those who are not part of the existing community food provision systems to make sure as many people as possible are provided for.

LOCAL BUSINESS COACHING

Many small business owners are struggling to navigate the complexities of this moment as we walk through this situation together. We have many professionals in our network and will bring together a team of volunteer accountants and attorneys to provide pro-bono advice to these small businesses. We want to leverage every resource we can to help our neighbors.

INTERVIEW AND RESUME COACHING

We are building a team of HR professionals who will provide resume and interview coaching for those looking for employment as a result of COVID-19\. These team members will be available to book for one-on-one coaching sessions. It’s crucial that we help people get back to work as quickly as possible, and while many jobs have been lost, there are opportunities emerging. We want to help people engage those opportunities well.

INCREASED PARTNERSHIPS

We will be doubling our partnership support budget, allowing us to reinforce our partners that are also working on COVID-19 relief. We have amazing partners doing excellent work throughout our community. In particular, we will focus on tutoring programs aiding those falling behind in the current distance learning settings.

SMALL BUSINESS ASSISTANCE

As small businesses plan to reopen in our community, we will celebrate, encourage, and assist them in a way that also allows us to love our community and those in need. Again, we want to leverage our financial resources to do so, but also leverage our people resources to do all we can to support those who are crucial in the development of our community.

LOCAL CHURCH SUPPORT

Our situation is not the norm. Many local churches are struggling during this time, so we want to come alongside our partner churches in a meaningful way. We want to ensure that they continue impacting their communities and are able to love people during this time, as well. It takes all kinds of churches to reach all kinds of people. Jesus’ mission of seeking and saving is our mission, and we want to invest heavily in that.

BENEVOLENCE

We have doubled our existing benevolence budget, allowing us to come alongside individuals and households who need assistance while they are working through unemployment or underemployment situations. Our team does an amazing job of helping people manage overwhelming financial situations. We want to make sure that team has the resources to do so with an increased demand.

CARE CALLS

The pastoral staff and the Care Team from Hoboken Grace have set up a system that allows anyone to schedule a personal call with them during the week. We want to be available to those who are working through difficult situations during this time. We believe it’s crucial to be available to those who need help personally navigating this moment.

For more information on how you can get involved and/or receive these services, visit [hobokengrace.com/relief/](http://Hobokengrace.com/relief/).


Home Response Plan

Mother’s Day is a beautiful day to remember to honor our mothers (Ephesians 6:1-2), remember how priceless they are (Proverbs 31:10), and to reflect on the life thatthey have provided (Psalm 113:9). Being a Mother is a unique and beautiful journey and as Hoboken Grace attendee Veronica stated perfectly, “it’s a blessing that cannot be taken for granted.”

Veronica is a single mother whose love for God is at the forefront of her household and her parenting. “Being a mom is a unique experience for every mom,” says Veronica. “There are no instructions on how to do it. It’s more of a learning process, a lot of instinct, and qualifications God provides to each mom to be the best mom according to her circumstances.”

The first time Veronica attended Hoboken Grace she felt a sense of welcoming amongst the struggle of personal emotions. Coming from a stable house growing up, she felt defining a “perfect family” for her son was an ongoing struggle when there was this overwhelming feeling of something missing. After that first invite from a friend, Veronica started attending Hoboken Grace every Sunday and it became a life changing moment for both her and her son. “It was my relationship with God that made a difference in how I see parenting,” she said. “It wasn’t until I drew closer to God that I understood I always had that perfect family I wanted for my son.”

Having Hoboken Grace integrated into her weekly routine, Veronica began to see how engaging God has changed how she envisions her and her son’s life. “Engaging God with my child has filled any voids, and any missing pieces. Having God in my family has renewed it and made it beautiful.”

Grace Kids became a new favorite for Veronica’s son. He even started to ask, “when are we going to church again?” Veronica is constantly making sure her son knows to love and trust God. A parental priority for Veronica is to ensure that her son knows God and that his future children know God as well.

She is constantly learning from her son, especially during quarantine. She has reflected on the truth that throughout life, kids are constantly teaching adults and not always the other way around! “\[Kids\] haven’t yet been ‘contaminated’ by the world, they are pure and giving. In the past couple months, I’ve learned so much about the patience kids have; they are always positive and they always forgive easily,” says Veronica.

Veronica celebrated this Mother’s Day by sharing a meal with her mom, niece and son. Her son even surprised her with a card he made himself! She reflected on the blessing it is to see a little baby become a little boy. “To see him grow with you is priceless,” says Veronica.

Hoboken Grace would like to wish everyone a very Happy Mother’s Day


A Gift Not Taken for Granted


Lost and Found: everybody probably knows the concept from their early school days. Someone would lose something, they’d have a rush of panic, and then they would head over to the designated “Lost and Found” area that was set up by one of your teachers where lost items can be claimed by those who found them in the hallway or playground during recess. I retrieved many of my winter gloves thanks to this system.

But what if it isn’t physical items that we’ve lost, but instead something on the emotional, mental, and spiritual side? The more time that goes by being under quarantine, the lonelier and more detached a lot of people feel. Even if you consider yourself an introverted person, your daily routine, family, and work life probably look extremely different these days and you may feel you’ve lost a sense of comfort as your indoor world has begun to shift.

![](https://res.cloudinary.com/dzs7qxusf/image/upload/v1/archive/2020/05/LF-Social_Post.jpg)The Lost and Found series comes to us at the time when many of us need it the most, which made Easter weekend the perfect time to kick-off this new exploration. Pastor Chris described Good Friday as one of the most significant examples of loss with Jesus being on the cross and, even in that moment, God was working in unfathomable ways. Jumping off of this, Anthony spoke about the frustrations that come with loss. When you don’t get that promotion at work you feel like you lost, when your favorite sports team loses that can be a frustrating feeling, or in the case of Anthony, you lose the charging case to your AirPods and now have to conserve their power in order to listen to music that week! Right now, while we’re on lock-down in our homes, we may feel frustrated with what has become of our city and the world at large. We may wonder where God’s plan is in all of this and how much of this is actually in His control.

I’ll often turn on the news and switch from station to station and say the same thing to myself every day, “this does not look under control.” But this series wasn’t only about exposing the chaos, but showing that in the middle of the storm God has a plan much greater than what we can see. This point was perfectly illustrated by Pastor Chris, later in the series, in the story of Joseph. Joseph was a man who seemed to have everything working against him. From being hated by his brothers, to being sold into slavery, to being thrown in prison; for a large portion of his life, things seemed hopeless for Joseph. I’m sure he wondered many times throughout this period, where is God’s plan in all of this and when will I see the results?

It can be easy for us to doubt God during hardships because we are living in the middle of the story which means it has not ended yet, and none of us know when the ending will take place. As one Hoboken Grace member I talked to said, “we tend to feel like we’re owed something when we experience loss. I often find myself falling into a trap, like good times will follow bad. But in reality, it doesn’t work that way. It’s all in God’s plan and timing.” I could relate to what they were saying because we often feel like something good should come out of this, but we’re just unsure of the when and the how.

Pastor Chris left us with an important detail in the story of Joseph which is that he did not let his circumstances and his experience of loss shape who he ultimately became. Joseph’s brothers could not fathom that he would actually forgive them after everything that they put him through. However, Joseph says in Genesis 50: 16-20, “don’t be afraid of me. Am I God, that I can punish you? You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people.”

Knowing the ending of Joseph’s story does not mean that you aren’t allowed to feel sad, scared or anxious about what’s going on in the world or in your personal life. After all, those are all human emotions that God has given us. But it is a reminder that even in the middle of dark times, He knows the end of the story, and He has a plan for everyone, even if it doesn’t seem like it in the moment.


Lost & Found

My kids love attending Grace Kids on Sunday mornings, I might even dare to say it is the highlight of their week. My 5 year old son Clark often requests “go to church” throughout the week and is disappointed when we explain that it is not Sunday so we can’t go today. Therefore, I’m sure you can imagine his dismay (and mine) when we had to start staying home on Sundays all together and he could no longer “go to church.” 

During this unique time, things have changed for us as parents and for our children. There are so many questions that we don’t have answers to. We know that the outcome of many of these questions is outside our control as parents. It is however, our responsibility to equip our children with the truth that God is FAITHFUL and that He is ALWAYS there for us. I know that I cannot do this alone which is why God gave us a community, but with social distancing, we have had to become creative. 

![](https://res.cloudinary.com/dzs7qxusf/image/upload/v1/archive/2020/04/Image-from-iOS-8-1.jpg)

So you can imagine the joy I felt when I found out that Grace Kids was going to be online every week. It was fantastic to watch the first time Clark was able to see “Ollie” on the computer and hear the familiar voices of his teachers as they introduced the lessons during Grace Kids Online. 

It’s pretty great to see all the things he’s learned in Grace Kids over the past few years as I have gotten to watch him engage with the lessons and say his memory verses. My daughter Aurora, who is 7, loves to sing and dance to the songs and often requires me to sing and dance along with her making it a total family experience. I feel like I’m even learning new things about God as I watch along with them. I find it really heartwarming and encouraging for me to be able to chat with the other parents during the live stream and see that we’re all still in this together as parents and that our kids are still able to connect with their teachers and learn about the one who loves them most. 

Currently, our children are also participating in school online from home during the weekdays and many parents are working from home as well. Some weeks, my son Clark, has a call with his school teacher and classmates on Wednesdays and hasn’t been able to watch Grace Kids live with his sister. We understand that there are many things competing for our time during the week! This is why I’m excited to announce that Grace Kids Online will be MOVING TO SUNDAYS! I’m super pumped about this change and I think it will help us to be able to focus on school and work during the week instead of feeling like we need to rush to get everything done at the same time. Clark may still ask to re-watch multiple times a week as he does now, but both he and his sister and YOU will be able to experience the live conversations with your friends and teachers anytime by visiting [hobokengrace.com/kids. ](https://hobokengrace.com/kids/)

I’m so grateful that, even during this time of uncertainty, we have this way to keep our kids engaged in Grace Kids and they can keep learning about how God made them, how He loves them, and how Jesus wants to be their friend forever.

So join me and tune in to a new day and time as Grace Kids Online moves to Sunday’s starting THIS Sunday, May 3rd at 8:30am for Preschool and 9am for Elementary. There will be music, bible stories and activities! We will not have Grace kids this Wednesday, April 29th,

Visit[ hobokengrace.com/kids](https://hobokengrace.com/kids/) to bring Grace Kids right to your home every Sunday! Can’t wait to see you there!


Grace Kids Online

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A Diverse, Growing, Contemporary, Community Church in Hoboken

Everything we do revolves around our mission of helping people find their way back to God. Our goal is to demonstrate who God really is and to let others know that God wants a relationship with each and every one of us.

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